11 November 2009

I'm just one of those weird people.

In email. In chat. On Twitter. Pretty much everywhere in my life, I'm the person who is always writing in complete sentences, with proper punctuation. Only rarely do I abbreviate things (WTF? is totally the new black, so shut it).

Things you'll never find in any written message from me (unless someone is holding a gun to my head):

u - as in "you."

ur - as in "your" or "you're," how handy that you don't even have to figure out which one.

lol, LOL, lololol - or any combination thereof. Also, I'm probably not laughing out loud. I don't lie about that sort of thing. For instance, mooog35? Caused me to actually launch snot across my desk with the joke at the end of this post.

2 - as in "to" or "too," or hell even as in "two." I actually follow the "if it's less than two digits, write it out" rule. And again, how lucky that you don't have to figure out which to use, "to" or "too."

dont, cant, shouldnt, didnt - as in "don't," "can't," "shouldn't," "didn't."

Wednesday's, DVD's, steak's - as in "Wednesdays," "DVDs," "steaks." Plurals don't need an apostrophe. Ever.

tho - it has three more letters people. How lazy can we be?

I'm sure there are others, but I can't think of any more.

The thing is, seeing any of those things in written communication to me? Pretty much causes me to stop paying attention. I try, but it's hard to take anything seriously when I have to translate it in my head. And I know I have some friends who do this...and I'm not judging you (only a little), but know that it is a testament to my love for you that I continue to translate. With anyone else? I'm out.

Don't feel bad. I'm the weird one. All the cool kids are doing it. But I don't want to get dumber, so I think I'll stick with complete sentences and stuff.


Stevie said...

I'm one of the weird ones, too. Even if I wanted to start typing in internet speak, I couldn't. It makes me cringe. The superfluous apostrophe thing makes absolutely no sense to me, either. WHY do people think they need to add one to any word that ends in S? UGH.

Jay Ferris said...

You and I are pretty much the same person. Minus the boobs and one or two other significant pieces of equipment.

rumblejax said...

I'm the same way. I hate it.

Alice said...

MEEEEE TOOOOO. when doing the internet/online dating thing, i literally deleted any responses that used "ur" or "2nite" etc etc etc. my current bf actually does this - although only in actual text messages at least, not in emails - and it drives me CRAAAZY.

(i say this as someone who is obviously too lazy to capitalize, and yes i see the irony of it.)

NatalieCottrell said...

Ok, I will give you never having seen Christmas movies (the good ones, at least) in exchange for my overuse of "tho." Deal?

Jodey/Fat Chick Biker said...

I'm with ya. I do use some abbreviations though. BTW, LOL and WTF are by far my favorites. The incorrect usage of the poor little apostrophe is quite annoying, I'll agree.

Spelling is my big thing. It bugs the shit out of me when things are spelled wrong. And even worse, when *I* spell something wrong. *gasp*

I can't grasp why people don't understand the difference between your and you're. Is it really THAT difficult for fuck's sake?

Meg Kathleen said...

I'm the same way - it really drives me nuts when people abbreviate words in blog posts. However, I do shorten words in texts. My excuse is that my phone is from the stone ages so it just takes too much energy to try and figure out to insert things like I don't even try.

brad said...

if i was the kind of person who actually saw things through, i would one day be remembered as the man who killed "lol."

carissajaded said...

I can be a little lazy when it comes to gchat or emails, but pretty much everything you mentioned above really bugs me. Especially because the people who frequently use those shortcuts-use them in every sentence and all the time. I am probably laziest when it comes to my text messaging. That is the only time I will everuse "U."

That Kind of Girl said...

Oh, I'm so with you on this! Capitalization I let slide in chat, and I usually skip terminal periods on one-sentence ims (though never in texts!), but other than these quirks, my spelling and punctuation are impeccable. I mean, come on. Language is everything everything and the least we can do is treat it right.

I got into a phase, though, a while ago of jokingly using the phrase: "u no it!" when my friends said anything particularly stupid. But had to stop when I was chatting with a relative stranger who didn't realize I was being ironic. Eek.

Ed Adams said...

I am sure I have been guilty of all of these infractions at one time or another.

I usually try to type grammatically correct, even if I never speak that way.

But sometimes, I'm just lazy and say "Fuck it!"

Johnny Virgil said...

You are my hero.

Toe said...

This lesson is way too advanced for my unlearning brain.

Jenny said...

I drop capitals in messenger, that's it.

What I hate? Is question marks in the middle of sentences, like that. Or the over-use of full stops when there should be commas or dashes or semi-colons, or whatever. I feel bad for sending that sentence with 'Or'.

But then my actual real live money-earning JOB is to go through peoples' books and correct all of that stuff, along with setting things up for the typesetter and shit, so yeah, I get a bit hysterical about grammar. I have to say I more or less ignore people on messenger or facebook who don't write things out properly; thank fuck I have literate friends.

Maryx said...

I totally agree with you!!!! =D Keep it that way! heehee!

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