Twitter just scared me. A lot.

So okay, yeah, I know...it's TMI Thursday. And you should really go look at LiLu's TMI Thursday Post Secret blahbadies. Like now. I'll wait.

I actually did have a TMI story all ready to write up today, but...then I decided to search for something on Twitter. And my mind has been blown. In a bad way.

Shot through the brain! And you're to blame. Twitter, you give the English Language a bad name.

Okay, I think I'm done with my Bon Jovi moment of the morning.

I've been thinking to myself (because really who else hears me when I think?), "Self, there must be a better way to googly chat on your phone than this really stupid Google Talk application that shuts off every time you close the window. I mean, people out there are clever. They must have come up with something."

And then Jenn over at You'll Grow to Love Me (WHAT? You're not reading her stuff? GO READ IT NOW. I'll wait...again.) tweeted a little somethin' somethin' about downloading an application called BeeJive. Hmmmm...

Then I promptly forgot all about it.

This morning, I remembered and looked to Twitter for advice. None was forthcoming, so I typed "BeeJive" into the search box.

Such a bad idea.

Here are some of the profiles that caught my eye:

ThaNiggaD

Favorite Tweet: Its crazy when u sellin drugs @ a yung age but u doin it n the wrong way! U gotta kno 2 hand off the right way!wtf I seen ur whole exchange

JAZZY_C0UTURE

Favorite Tweet: #twitterafterdark get me open while im cummin down ya throat and! U wna b my main squeeze nigga? dnt ya? Ya wanna lick btween my knees niqqa

DreyDayBaby

Favorite Tweet: @[some other twitterer] oh yea I feel u .. Your a junior rite? I'm at my cuzins job christmas party deep in da bx sumwhere lol

Patticakez

Favorite Tweet: #sidechickawareness you call him and he talking to you like u 1 of his boys then says aight my nigga ima call u later and hangs up lmfao

And my PERSONAL FAVORITE - Swaggz9mg

Favorite Tweet: Dis new ubertwitter app is iight I cud fuck wit it

I love that last guy because between all the horrid spelling and bizarre sentence structure, there's this tweet: Work is dead right now surprisingly.

That one tweet gives me hope that people actually DO know how to spell and make sentences. And then crashes me back to the ground when I realize that this means that they're just CHOOSING not to bother.

Sad Panda.

In other news, I think I'm going to go ahead and download BeeJive.