It's Friday, we should break up - (Awesomely) Bad Ideas

You know the ones I'm talking about. Like Clear Pepsi. Ick.

I'm making a completely separate and really stupid personal decision right now, but I thought I'd share the awesomely bad idea I had last night.

It was time to dye my hairs. First of all, I always hate my hair for at least the first week (this time is no exception). It's either (that) too dark, too bright, too light, too...ugly. Whatever. Right now, it's far too dark.

Second, I can't really figure out how other people do this hair dyeing thing at home. I can't really do it with clothes on. I always drip the dye all over myself and then when I have clothes on, it's hard to get them off without getting dye all over them. So I just do it naked. It's easier that way.

Except of course, that I then have to rinse the dye out of my hair...naked.

I don't like to get in the shower and rinse it because I don't like the feeling that the dye is all over me. So I usually kneel in front of the tub and put my head under the faucet.

In a normal bathtub, this isn't really an issue. I, however, have a garden tub. And a busted knee. This time I particularly didn't want to get dye in my open wound, but I also didn't really want to kneel in front of the tub.

I stood there for a minute, contemplating. I didn't have many options. Grin through the pain (and thereby, surely get hair dye in my mouth, yuck!), get in the shower (and thereby, surely get hair dye in my open wound, yuck!), actually wash the glasses in my kitchen sink and rinse it in there (but it was time to rinse!), or...this:



Let me explain. You should know that I told my eight-year-old niece about the situation, and she drew that picture. I think she's quite good, no?

That's a lie. I drew it. I'm a terrible artist. I know this. But here we are.

So my brilliant plan was to lie (Naked, mind you. Seriously, I'm this smart), long-ways along the edge of the tub, with one leg stretched out down the length of the tub. However, I couldn't really balance very well, so I ended up propping my other leg up on the toilet.

I should maybe mention that the proportions of this drawing are probably completely off. See above. I'm a terrible artist. You're getting an aerial view because I have no idea how to adjust my perspective to make corners and such. I tried and my tub just looked like it was about to fall over. So maybe that's where my talent lies. Drawing wobbly, unstable things.

And no, I don't have an amputated arm. That one was just up underneath me. Also, um, I have no idea how to draw my own ass. So I just went without. I tried with disastrous results. Which have been burned.

This technique actually worked pretty well, for the first ten minutes. When I still couldn't get all the dye out, though, my arms started to fall asleep. It was hard to breath with the tub pressing on my lungs. And I got dye in my eyes. Of course.

All this so I could hate my hair for a week.