14 July 2009

Care Burden, y'all.

As proof that I have the best readers in the whole world, today's blog is brought to you by Jeff over at This is Why Your Hold Time is so Long. If you haven't read his stuff, go check him out. I feel more and more sorry for him everyday (because his job sucks, people).

Yesterday's blog inspired him so much, that he wrote an entire song and sent me the lyrics. Without further ado, I give you:

"Care Burden" by Angsty Mötorboat

I want to be with you, know you, own you
I want to like you, love you, be near you.
My soul is beautiful and I want you to see
I want you and want you to want me

I pretended to be normal when we first met
This is how I entangled you into my net
Now that you're trapped and kinda into me
I'm opening the floodgates of insecure insanity

So I'm sending you text mesages
and calling your phone
I'm not gonna give you
five minutes alone
If you don't answer
and if you don't share
I'm really very sorry
to burden you with my care

[sad and mellow guitar riff, which emphasizes the soulpain and angst]

I feel so rejected and I'm brimming with hate
It's only been a week, but you were my soulmate
How dare you destroy all the plans that I had
You make all my feelings turn scary and sad

Where will I find another woman like you?
I'm not believing it, we're not through
You're one in a million, clearly the best
Mainly because I've scared off all the rest


(Author's note: I'm not sure how to end this song, but I'm pretty
certain the singer devolves into screams and mumbling bordeline
psychotic phrases like "I made a doll that looks like you" and "I
watch you without you knowing")

What can I say Shine, it's a slow day at work.


UPDATE: Cheese hears this to a punked up version of the Free Credit Report song. I concur. Who's going to make that happen (I have no musical talent, aside from the occasional karaoke)? Jeff is on board with this plan.


Travis said...

I had a lighter up by the end of this. Nice.

Jay Ferris said...

An instant classic!

Anonymous said...

Oh. My. Dear. God.

I became hooked right about here:
I'm not gonna give you
five minutes alone

That is brilliance.

Life in the Cube said...

Is it on iTunes?

headbitingprincess said...

encore encore ~!!!!!!!!! ~

mysterg said...

Your previous post made me think of "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley but with more of a creepy serial killer vibe but this is inspired. I call the tambourine.

Mia said...

Gotta love it!! I'm thinking heavy strings and screamo vibe...

Antje Spethmann said...

hmmm. I'm thinking the guys from Spoonfed Tribe would be way into doing this song for you.

Just A Girl said...

I just died laughing at this. Like I'm actually dead. You know how a chicken keeps running around for a few seconds after you cut its head off? My fingers type for a few minutes after I die of laughter.

shine said...

Travis: I believe it.

Jay Ferris: Just wait until the music happens.

longredcape: I'm with you. It's just genius.

Life in the Cube: I'm sure it will be soon. I'll keep you posted.

headbitingprincess: I'm on it!

Mysterg: The tambourine is totally yours.

Mia: Sounds just about right.

Antje: Ooooh, good call! I'm not sure they're angry enough, though.

Just A Girl: That? Is a hilarious picture in my head. said...

"I made a doll that looks like you!!!"
Oh. My. Fucking. God.
That phrase (screaming semi coherently) will ring through my head all day! I love crazy.

shine said...

Kim: Feel free to send me a recording. We are so going to make this an internet sensation!

Phronk said...


I imagine it being sung by a dude with a whiny Simple Plan type of voice, and to even more terrible music. Somehow.

shine said...

Phronk: But how??

Travis said...

I love Simple Plan. :(

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