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01 April 2009

I feel naked without mascara.

Does anyone else have this problem?

I don't wear much other makeup, but I feel totally naked without mascara. And chapstick, but I don't think that counts as makeup. Plus, I never leave home without my tube of Burt's Bees.

Last night, I watched Dancing with the Stars. It's just painful. Steve Wozniak, Steve-O, that one chick who used to be Heff's girlfriend and now is trying to be famous for...anything else. It was a LOT of bad dancing. With a super dramatic (not) double elimination at the end. Which, I suspect was to get rid of Steve Wozniak. And it worked!

Last night's performers, musically speaking of course, were some horrible guy who couldn't decide if he was singing country, pop, or rap (I know, you don't "sing" rap, but I had to be consistent. Shut it.) and Boyz II Men. Wow.

It seems that we just like music that really blows now. The first guy was TERRIBLE. I feel certain that he must have gotten picked on at school as a kid. Now he's in his 40s and trying to do the same music as Britney (sort of), but with a country and rap twist, while he dresses like that emo kid we all avoid like the bubonic plague. Except of course, that no one can avoid the bubonic plague, so it ends up on national television. It was painful.

Later, Boyz II Men performed. I'm going to admit that I was mildly excited. I loved Boyz II Men back in the day. Motown Philly. Back. Again.

Yeah, no. Remember when they used to be able to harmonize? Well, they can't any more. I was hoping that atrocity they called the National Anthem at the World Series a couple of years ago was a fluke. But no. The backup singers were the only reason that they didn't sound exactly like a cat sliding slowly and painfully down a chalkboard nails first. And they lost a boy...where did he go? Maybe he was the only one who could really sing? The skinny one has filled out nicely, though, I will say that.

Speaking of "reality" television, I'm thinking that the people in charge of running our country should take more of a reality television approach to solving our current economic crisis. Or this business with car manufacturers. Or, well, anything. Think about it. People get really fired up about this American Idol crap, right? Maybe set up a show where the "contestants" are actually solutions to some of our bigger problems. And let the people call in to vote. Or something. Possibly a drag race or hot dog eating contest is in order. C'mon government, get in there and get people excited!

It's just an idea. I mean, if millions of people can watch some "older" woman try to get with some younger men and care, why not care about the state of our health care system? Make it sexy!

(Because this Idiocracy thing? Is happening.)

Oh, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TONY! Sorry you couldn't take the day off.

5 comments:

Jay said...

I'm thankful to have missed both their butchering of the national anthem, and the DwtS debacle from last night. The last thing I need is to see another of my 90's loves being slowly crushed by the oppressive, talent-sucking hand of time.

Oh, and it's not my birthday. And my name is Jay. But thanks all the same.

Losing It said...

Re: naked w/out mascara

I'm totally there with you. My German coloring (aka blonde eyelashes/eyebrows) make me look like I have none at all a la a space freak. God, it's so hard to be beautiful.

shine (the artist formerly known as meshealle) said...

I'm going to have to get out my iPod, so I can relive the awesomeness of Boyz II Men.

Although we've come...to the end of the road...

Losing It: You said it! It's hard to be beautiful. But we do it so well.

deadleafecho said...

Thank you uh, shine.....meshealle....uh yeah, must maintain your secret identity...
Oh and regarding Idiocracy, yeah, I'm just waiting for the next I go to the doctor and he tells me "...it says on your chart that you're fucked up. Ah, you talk like a fag, and your shit's all retarded."
Then I will know the robots have won.

shine (the artist formerly known as meshealle) said...

Yes, my secret identity is very important.

What a great commentary on our society. :-)